Musings

Some of you requested a copy of our vows and the heartfelt presentations our mothers gave. We'll start with my mom's words:

Musings by Janie Gildersleeve

Musings are defined as calm, lengthy reflections; the process of giving serious thought to something. Musings best describes my words for you today, George and Amanda.

You have decided that your love for one another is important enough to make a life long commitment. Take your commitment seriously. Cherish and honor your commitment. Make your relationship a life priority.

I challenge you today with two scriptures:

The first is Ecclesiastes 4:9 & 10. “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their work. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion.” Focus on and learn from the positive examples you both have in your lives. You, Amanda, have grandparents in their 61st year of marriage. Be patient with one another. Although you have been together for years, there will be many new discoveries in the days and years ahead. Grow personally. Grow as a couple. Keep romance alive. Be best friends. Be encourager's of one another. Gary Chapman, in his book The Five Love Languages, describes couple interactions and ways of relating to our spouse. Learn each others' love language....do you love to be touched?....do you more value a gift?....do you most appreciate words of affirmation or the gift of another's time?...what about being surprised by a chore being done without asking? I challenge you, George, to ask Amanda---as David often asks me----these three questions. What can I do to be a better husband? What can I do to make your life easier? How can I help you? Amanda, ask the same of George.

The second verse I give you as a challenge is Ephesians 4:26. It simply says, “Do not let the sun go down on your anger.” Don't be afraid to apologize. Likewise, learn to forgive. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate. Talk about differences and disagreements as they surface. Deal with them and don't let them fester. Also, celebrate and share your joys, successes and accomplishments. Work hard at your marriage but don't allow your marriage to become work. Steven Covey, author of 7 Habits for Highly Effective People, speaks of emotional bank accounts and how relationally we should strive to keep this account balance high. Deposits are made by acts of kindness and acceptance as well as words of praise. Make regular deposits in your marital bank account. George, Amanda continually praises you for your support of her and the kindnesses & respect you show her daily. You already have a head start on this account!

Amanda, you have always been my traveler. By your picture in the family room is a plaque that says, “Though distance may come between a mother and her child, the bond that holds them close will never weaken. The love they share will never be more than a memory apart.” Amanda and George, wherever you go, wherever life takes you, we will continue to make and share special memories. God bless your marriage. I love you both.

Love, Mama